You're Still Here
by BaeHalstead
Summary: This idea popped into my head, and I am not entirely happy with the way it turned out because I'm not much of a writer. but I decided I'd share it anyway. It's a Linstead one-shot in which Jay gets has to go back to Afghanistan but doesn't tell Erin. She ends up finding out anyway and isn't very happy about it.


Jay Halstead sat alone in his quiet Chicago apartment, packing the bag he thought he'd never have to pack again. The thought of receiving that one phone call hadn't even crossed his mind since the last time he returned home safely. But, it happened, and within the next 48 hours he will be boarding a plane back to what could be considered hell on Earth.

While his mind was racing with thoughts of all the little things that had to be done before leaving- taking out the trash, cleaning his fridge, or even as simple as remembering his toothbrush, he failed to do one thing. _One very important task_, which he was _ordered_ not to do.

The knock on his door at 2 in the morning came almost as unexpected as the phone call. It wasn't a normal knock, it was a desperate_, I know you're home _type of knock. When he answered the door he wasn't planning on seeing his partner, angrier than ever with bloodshot eyes that made it seem like she'd been crying for days.

"Were you just not going to tell me?" Erin Lindsay exclaimed the second her partner's face came into view. "Were you going to leave for Afghanistan and not tell your partner about any of it?"

Jay had never seen this look in Erin's eyes before. It was a look of disappointment, anger, and worst of all, betrayal. He tried to explain, "Erin lis-", but was cut off by the fierce tone of his partner's voice.

"I'm your _partner_, Jay, and if you weren't going to tell me on a personal level because I was dating Kelly Severide then that's fine, but hell;_ everyone_ knew but me." As she spoke the anger was replaced with sadness until she stopped, trying to hold in the tears that would fall is she said another word.

Jay took Erin's slight pause as an opportunity to speak up, "I wanted to tell you, _believe me_ I did, but Voight didn't want me to. He thought he knew what telling you would do to you. He thought that if you found out after I was gone it would hurt less. But I know, and you know, that it's bullshit." He waited for her to say something, but she was silent, so he continued. "The minute after I found out, you were the one I wanted to call most. You were the one I needed, but for the sake of everyone around me I called Voight. What a bad decision that was because I love you, and what Voight says or thimks shouldn't be able to change that." He turned away and walked into his tiny apartment, not knowing whether or not she would follow. Only when he heard the door shut behind him did he turn around.

Erin didn't know what to think. Her mind was racing, and all she wanted to do was kiss him. She watched him walk away and she wasn't quite sure what to do. This isn't how things are supposed to be with them. This can't be the way this ends. So, instead of leaving and going back home to her apartment where she knew nobody would be waiting for her considering she had broken up with the firefighter a mere 3 hours before, she took the few steps into her partner's apartment right after he did.

She was there. Jay was confused to as to why she didn't leave. "You're still here." It wasn't a question. Rather a statement that proves their entire relationship.

"I'm still here." And that was all Jay needed to know that she feels the same way.

Jay walked the few steps over to his partner where she was standing between his door and couch, staring at him with pleading eyes.

With every step he took, Erin could feel her blood pressure rising. By the time his chest was only a couple inches away from her own, her heart felt like it was beating a million miles a minute. This was it. This is their one day. Slowly and calmly, Jay closed the gap between the two and kissed her. Hard. Passionate. At this point he didn't care what Voight thought, what the rules were, that he'd be leaving for 8 months in less than 2 days, and he sure as hell didn't give a damn about Kelly Severide.

Time seemed to stop as the two stood in Halstead's living room, kissing as if their lives depended on it. Neither tried to take it farther, they were content with just each other. Eventually, Erin broke the kiss and softly said, "I broke up with Kelly," she paused, but Jay knew there was more coming "and I love you too." With that, Jay kissed her again, and led her to the bedroom lifting her up so she could wrap her legs around his waist. Clothes were discarded along the way and kisses were sloppy until they pounced onto Jay's bed.

This is messy, and they know that, but sometimes messy is good. They know that in just a few days things are going to go downhill. Jay will have to board that plane, and Erin will have to partner up with Ruzek for a few months. They know that there is going to be a whole 8 months being apart, in order to spend a lifetime together. They know that they will survive this, because they love each other.


End file.
